Tag: emotional eating

    Self Compassion and Emotional Eating

    self-compassion-and-emotional-eating

    Many of us eat for emotional reasons — when we’re sad, angry, happy, stressed, or lonely — we find ourselves eating so that we feel better. And eating works!

    Temporarily.

    Unfortunately, we usually feel worse afterwards — both emotionally and physically. More often than not this triggers a cycle of  beating yourself up — quite literally adding insult to injury — as the guilt and shame become yet another trigger for emotional eating, feeding the eat-repent-repeat cycle.

    Now, what would happen it we agreed the first step to breaking this cycle is self-compassion instead of self-criticism? How might that help? And more importantly, where would we start?

    How does self-compassion help with emotional eating?

    As difficult as it may seem to get our heads around, being understanding and forgiving of yourself for overeating will help you take the next step to finding other ways to meet your emotional needs.

    After all, we don’t eat for emotional reasons because we’re ‘weak-willed’… ‘stupid’… or ‘out of control’… We do it because it works!

    Blaming, shaming, criticizing, and finding fault for attempting to care for yourself only backfires. Imagine you were teaching a young child something new… would blaming, shaming, criticizing, and finding fault help or hurt? The way you speak to yourself has just as much power! You may be feeling afraid that if you are ‘nice’ to yourself, you won’t change. However, the exact opposite is true! You care for yourself because you accept yourself, not so you’ll accept yourself.

    So, how can you begin to respond with self-compassion when you overeat?

    Three Ways to Nurture Self-Compassion

    Gently acknowledge that you were doing the best you could in that moment.

    Validate your thoughts, feelings, and actions as being normal and understandable given the circumstances. “Of course!” It’s like saying, “I totally get why you thought, felt, or did that!”

    Of course you ate! Who wouldn’t want to feel better when they’re sad, angry, stressed, or lonely — or magnify the pleasure when they’re glad? This validation and unconditional acceptance creates a safe environment for experimenting with new thoughts, feelings, and actions.

    When you overeat, validate the choice as being rational at the time: “Of course you __________________!” This gentle, understanding self-talk will open the door to exploring how you might do it differently next time if you don’t like how it turned out.

    Bring Non-judgmental Awareness to the Situation.

    Mindful eating is all about bringing nonjudgmental awareness to your choices and experiences with eating. Non-judgment is essential because it provides a more objective understanding of what happened and why.

    One tactic you can try is writing about an overeating or binge eating episode and identifying the ‘voices’ that show up. Non-judgmentally recognising how your Restrictive Eating, Overeating, and Binge Eating voices drive the cycle will give you a great opportunity to cultivate your own Self-Care Voice.

    Cultivate Your Self-Care Voice

    Your Self-Care Voice wants the best for you. It is unconditionally compassionate, affirming and accepting. Your Self-Care voice is the voice of kindness and wisdom. It is like a loving parent who guides you to learn from your mistakes, face your challenges, and loves you unconditionally, faults and all.

    Fiona Wilkinson

    The Psychological Key to Weight Loss

    behavioural therapy

    No, it’s not exercise! Ninety percent of people ignore psychological well-being as a factor in weight loss

    Most of us think diet and exercise — especially exercise — is actually the key to weight loss.

    In fact lack of exercise is not the cause of obesity, it is too many calories,  refined carbs and too much sugar. This may explain why most people who manage to lose weight, soon put it straight back on.

    Dr Diane Robinson, a neuropsychologist at Orlando Health, said:

    “Most people focus almost entirely on the physical aspects of weight loss, like diet and exercise.

    But there is an emotional component to food that the vast majority of people simply overlook and it can quickly sabotage their efforts.”

    The survey of over a thousand Americans found that:

    • 31% thought lack of exercise was the biggest barrier to weight loss.
    • 26% said it was what you eat.
    • 17% thought it was down to the high costs of being healthy.
    • 12% guessed that lack of time stopped people losing weight.

    Only 10%, though, supported the idea that psychological well-being was important in weight loss.

    The Psychological Key to Weight Loss

    Dr Robinson said:

    “That may explain why so many of us struggle.

    In order to lose weight and keep it off long term, we need to do more than just think about what we eat, we also need to understand why we’re eating.”

    The emotional connection most people have built up with food is surprisingly powerful.

    Learning to understand this connection can be more useful even than learning about the nutritional value of food.

    Dr Robinson explained:

    “If we’re aware of it or not, we are conditioned to use food not only for nourishment, but for comfort.

    That’s not a bad thing, necessarily, as long as we acknowledge it and deal with it appropriately.”

    Perhaps worst of all, comfort food doesn’t even actually improve our mood, research has found.

    Dr Robinson provides three tips for those looking to understand their emotional connection with food:

    1. Keep a daily diary of food and mood. Look it over for any patterns which emerge. For example, are there particular foods attached to particular moods?
    2. Spot the foods that make you feel good. Is it about evoking a memory or are you eating from stress?
    3. Before eating, think: do I need this because I’m hungry or is it something else (like stress). If it’s stress, food isn’t the way to deal with it.

    Fiona Wilkinson